Tag Archives: babies

Oribi Mom

Oribi Mom: Not so secret visitors feasting in the macadamias

They’re fighting against crazy odds to survive as their natural habitat gets smaller.

Nyala bull. PHOTO WIKIPEDIA

July 15, 2023

It’s the third day in a row I’ve seen them. Three shining hazel-coloured coats with white stripes dazzling in the morning sun. They stand there in the macadamia grove, hoping we won’t see them.

Maybe if they stand dead still, we’ll pass by quickly. But they forget that their flopsy, large ears flick away the bugs all the time. And the shape of them stands out very clearly against the backdrop of natural forest that drops off sharply below them.

Somehow, they find their way up through the cliffs and forest and steep gorge slopes. They follow paths the rest of us might not even recognise as throughways, pushing past thick bush and sharp prickles and over loose rocks to get to where they’re going. They’re brazen about chomping baby mac trees, but how can they pass on such succulent treats? They’re planted neatly in rows and cleared of long grass. It’s like a smorgas board as winter dries up the natural vegetation a little in the valley below.

Longtime Residents of Oribi Gorge and Other Wild Places

Nyalas are, by far, our most beautiful natural antelope here. The bulls have the most impressive curling horns with bright orange legs sticking out beneath the dark, hairy coats.

The males are called bulls because their impressive size competes with eland and kudu and all these much larger animals. But the dainty females are called ewes, not cows. They’re not big enough to classify in the upper category like their male counterparts. At least, that’s what the game rangers have told me on trips up to Hluhluwe.

Lessons From Antelope? I’ll Take Them

Even if that’s a tall tale, I’m entranced to have these beautiful nyalas right here at home. They’re just a stone’s throw away from me, a human female who needs regular reminders that how others classify me is no concern of mine. It shouldn’t be, anyway.

These ewes-not-cows are still incredibly beautiful. They’re good mommies to the baby nyalas we see every season. And they’re fighting against crazy odds to survive as their natural habitat gets smaller and smaller thanks to development, mines, and yes, farming.

So, they can nibble our mac trees (Sssh, don’t tell the farmers!) if it means I can still watch them. Let them shining in the sunshine in fifty years’ time with the oribis, duikers, warthogs, reedbuck, and everything else.

Published here.

Oribi Mom

Oribi Mom: Teetering Into Winter 2023

“Using terms like “when they were little” feels crazy when they’re five and three. But they’re boys now, not babies.”

PHOTO BY PIXABAY
June 13, 2023

We’re back into the stage of head bumps, bleeding gums, and closed baby gates now. Teething and learning to walk is hard, even for the third time running. Granted, the poor child has pushed out five teeth in just two months, and a sixth is just poking its enamel out this week, too. Thank goodness we live in South Africa and have easy access to droewors, hey.

Somehow, babies manage to get themselves into the strangest predicaments before you know what’s happening. For example, he can quite easily get under the bed, but do you think he can reverse to get himself out again? Of course not. He can also get up onto a molly box, which is just high enough to cause Mom to panic about him going head-first off it. Let’s not talk about the stairs that run off the porch. We’re still being quite diligent about keeping that little gate closed but, with two brothers around, it’s only a matter of time.

The new game is to unpack the Tupperware cupboard. That means taking every single item out and spreading them around the floor. There’s also an affinity for the bookshelf. I remember now why we made a kids’ books shelf to distract his two brothers when they were little. And it truly does go by so very quickly.

Using terms like ‘when they were little’ feels crazy when they’re five and three. But they’re boys now, not babies. They don’t unpack the bookshelves or get stuck on tables or try to stick their heads through the security gate bars anymore. Though, the three year old did manage to vomit into the nebuliser this morning, so there’s that.

In a few weeks or months, they’ll be walking. And then they’ll be in their first job interview. Hopefully, we can keep up, and take it all in.

Published here.

Oribi Mom

Oribi Mom: Post-Apocalypse? No Just the Mall

“Dim lights greeted us, thanks to yet another load shedding cycle. Empty shops had papered windows and scratched off signs.”

PHOTO: Unsplash

October 25, 2022

I had a strange experience the other day. Work stuff had been tedious that day and the afternoon brought a very strong craving for fish and chips. So, we took the half-hour front into town.

After some fresh fillets and a little runaround, we went off to the mall. Why? Because that’s what rural farm people who live thirty minutes from the nearest shop must do. We tend to buy groceries whenever we come to the big city (fresh milk is such a luxury). Our family also loves the fresh smoothies on sale for R10 at our favourite fruit and veg shop. Steel straws trump the disgusting paper ones for these delicious and refreshing fruit concoctions.

Warning: these smoothies do not do well when dropped onto the floor – and they slide easily out of the baby seat in the trolley!

Anyway, with two children under five and a pregnant lady, a bathroom break is inevitable on these trips. This time we ventured into the family bathroom, the ones with the tiny toilet next to the big toilet and a low basin next to a normal one. The children think it’s a huge joke. And, at least we don’t have to make excuses for wet tyres on the car in the parking lot.

Walking through the mall was incredibly strange, though. We haven’t really been out much in two years, especially as a whole family. We let the boys have a few minutes on the jungle gym. They were the only children there!

Four years ago, we used to go weekly with our toddler and happily let him play with any other children he found. How life has changed. Now we run the other way if another person is in sight. We sanitise. We stay vigilant about where they are at all times, especially near the surfaces people lean on.

As we walked over to the final leg of the grocery shop, it was equally disturbing. Dim lights greeted us, thanks to yet another loadshedding cycle. Empty shops had papered windows and scratched off signs.

ATMs had ‘Out of Order’ pages taped onto their screens. Is this the South Coast post-apocalypse? What did we miss? Maybe we should just go back to the farm again. Though, I’m happy to say that we repeated this trip more recently and everything seemed a lot more ‘normal’.

There’s hope.

Published here.

Oribi Mom

Oribi Mom: No Wedding Video To Show Our Sons

“If we had invested in a professional videographer that day, we could have shown our sons what their parents, aunties, uncles and other friends looked like.”

The reward of reaching 15 years with three kids and a full memory bank has been worth it so far.

October 1, 2022

Many of you may already know that it sometimes pays to go through your cupboards and boxes. All three boys are transitioning into the next clothing size and I was taking a hands-free 20 minutes to fold laundry and sort things out.

When the piles of clothing were finally back into the right spaces, my eyes fell on a shoebox right at the back of the shelf. Oh yes, Mom brought that over a few months ago and I haven’t had a chance to look in it yet.

As I opened it up, I realised it was a few things from my childhood room; some wedding invitations, a photograph or two; printer’s tray items. How sweet to remember the little ornaments I spent so much time looking at and playing with as a girl. Too delicate to pass on to rough and tumble toddler boys just yet, though.

Look Closer at the Memories for Treasures

As I scanned the items, I saw an envelope with a single name on it in my handwriting. Who is that? Let’s call him Ben.

I only remembered one person by that name – a boy in my primary school. I didn’t remember ever writing him a letter, so I opened it. Three R100 notes fell on the floor! And as I read the note, it became clear.

“Here’s something to say thank you for taking our wedding video. Hope 2008 is a wonderful year for you!”

Oh, that Ben.

The one who offered to film our wedding almost 15 years ago. The friend who never arrived.

Still Frames in the Mind Are Treasured, Too

That’s right, we don’t have a wedding video to remember our very special union at 21 and 23. Those fresh-faced young people in the photographs are captured in still frames only. Their sincere voices and excited celebrations are a distant memory now.

Wedding guests didn’t have smartphones to capture clips of the day. There wasn’t even WhatsApp.

“Car trouble, sorry,” the message said as we were dressing for our long-awaited big day.

We’d dated for six years and were finally old enough to tie the knot. As we stood overlooking the ocean and said our vows, only the guests and gulls bore witness. We signed papers and we beamed at the prospect of what the future might hold for us.

Guests swam between the ceremony and the reception to stave off the oppressive January heat. Speeches and friends’ songs made everybody cry and laugh. And then, we moved on with our lives.

Maybe We’d Do It Differently But Time Doesn’t Rewind – Enjoy the Moments!

Maybe if we had invested in a professional videographer that day, we could have shown our sons what their parents, aunties, uncles and other friends looked like and how they sounded at the start of something beautiful.

Thankfully, we’ve invested more wisely into marriage. Love takes work, but the reward of reaching 15 years with three kids and a full memory bank has been worth it so far.

And, now we have some cash to go on a well-deserved date night one of these days to celebrate. Happy early anniversary to us.

Published here.

Oribi Mom

Oribi Mom: Keep the Lights On and Call Somebody

“Friends lightheartedly commented in May last year that they hoped to meet my little one before he was walking – too late, he took his first steps last week.”

Our woolly-necked storks are residents or intra-African migrants.

April 8, 2021

The first of those lockdown babies has turned ONE! Did you remember?

A year after our lives were turned upside down by an invisible threat, we are still in isolation and it doesn’t feel normal yet. There are likely people in your circles who have changed jobs, lost livelihoods, recovered from surgeries, and upgraded their smartphones. In a whole year, there are also mothers who fell pregnant, watched their bellies expand, and now have an infant – without seeing anyone.

Can you imagine not one of your mommy friends admiring your bump over tea or meeting your child? That is now normal.

It’s Been a Year of Wondering When Things Will Be Normal Again

I haven’t been to a shop in over a year. Or in-person church.

Friends lightheartedly commented in May last year that they hoped to meet my little one before he was walking – too late, he took his first steps last week. My cute two-year-old is now a tall, rambunctious three-going-on-thirteen, rolling eyes and all. He’s outgrown several clothes sizes in a year and forgotten the names of some friends he played with every week before – a year is third of his whole lifespan!

My pregnant belly is now an 11-month toddler who wants to feed himself. He gets excited about the loud sounds of tractors and vacuum cleaners. He’s never met his extended family, including great-grandparents.

So Much Has Changed and Yet So Much Is Still the Same

Will we be looking back the same way another year from now? I don’t know.

Our garden has undergone another season of growth, as has our marriage. Even the swallows are getting ready to leave again after their six-monthly residence on the farm.

I know that you should check on your friends, even if it’s over WhatsApp. Everyone is not okay. South Africans are tough, but these have been dark days where social lifelines haven’t been forthcoming. We need friends and family, but we have also needed to obey the laws and minimise the spread of a virus.

We recently went through five days without electricity on the farm after a terrible lightning storm, but it was like a welcome reset in many ways. My fridge has never looked so clean as it emptied rapidly and couldn’t be refilled.

There’s some light for 2021, but we might have to enjoy a few candlelit dinners to see it. We don’t need complicated technology or filled calendars to be happy.

We do need connection, though. Relationships are the electricity of a fulfilled life.

What changes have you been through in a year of lockdown? Are there connections you need to restore? Don’t lose hope, you’ve already come through an entire year of life-altering abnormality. Keep the lights on and call somebody.

Published here.